Funniest Parenting Tweets: What Moms And Dads Said On Twitter This Week

Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways — so we like to round up the most hilarious 140-character quips from moms and dads to spread the joy.

Our guest curator this week is Kim Bongiorno, who blogs at Let Me Start By Saying and right here on HuffPost Parents. Read her selections below, and follow @HuffPostParents and @LetMeStart on Twitter for more!

No, you can’t have candy for breakfast. Don’t be silly. Now be quiet and let me finish my peppermint mocha frappuccino.

— John Lyon (@JohnLyonTweets) February 26, 2015

The scariest thing I’ve heard my toddler say: "I poured my own syrup!"

— Kristen Chase (@thatkristen) February 24, 2015

Oh yeah? Well could an idiot do this?

— YKIHAYHT (@YKIHAYHT) February 25, 2015

When I make a healthy dinner, I do it so you will live a LONG life. When you don’t eat it, I want to kill you. Love is complicated.

— BadParentingMoments (@BPMbadassmama) February 23, 2015

Your dinner tonight
is being served à la carte.
"Carte" meaning the fridge.

— Peyton Price (@Suburbanhaiku) February 24, 2015

If your plan for quieting a baby consists of a mocking bird, a diamond ring and a billy goat, you probably shouldn’t be a parent.

— Sarcasticsapien (@Sarcasticsapien) February 23, 2015

The Huffington Post