When It Comes To Sexual Assault, #TheresNoPerfectVictim

There is no such thing as a perfect rape victim.

People who report their experiences of sexual assault are subjected to constant questioning and scrutiny — as if there is a certain way “real victims” should behave after being raped. In reality, people process trauma in myriad ways, and someone’s reaction after being assaulted should not be used as “proof” that a rape didn’t happen if it doesn’t match up with the way society believes a victim “should” act.

Emma Sulkowicz, an activist who began carrying her mattress around Columbia’s campus after the school refused to expel a student who she says raped her, has been vilified for contacting her rapist after he assaulted her — apparently, her story is “less believable” because of it. Women who report that Bill Cosby assaulted them have been publicly criticized for not coming forward earlier.

In a Dec. 1 essay for TIME, Susan J. Brison highlighted the issues with how we treat rape victims when she explained why she reported one instance of being raped — when she was assaulted by a stranger at knifepoint, beaten and left for dead — but not another, when she was raped by an acquaintance in her dorm room.

“One was the best kind of rape, as far as my credibility as a victim was concerned,” Brison wrote. “The other was the worst.”

There is no such thing as a perfect human being. There’s no perfect way to respond to rape. #TheresNoPerfectVictim

— Wagatwe Wanjuki (@wagatwe) February 4, 2015

Here’s what you need to know about rape victims, because there’s no such thing as a “perfect” one:

Just because someone was drinking or doing drugs at the time of their assault doesn’t mean they were “asking for it:”

When you drink, you’re responsible for YOUR actions. Not the actions of what other people do. #TheresNoPerfectVictim

— Cecelia (@CeceliaLorraine) February 4, 2015

although rape shield law exists, survivors are questioned about their drinking with the implication that drunk=slutty #TheresNoPerfectVictim

— Kimya Forouzan (@kimyaf) February 4, 2015

This online conversation is a brutal look at how society treats rape victims — and explains why so many victims are unwilling to come forward.

It’s time for a change.

Need help? In the U.S., visit the National Sexual Assault Online Hotline operated by RAINN. For more resources, visit the National Sexual Violence Resource Center’s website.

The Huffington Post