Whether you think spying on your kids is acceptable in today’s digital age or a breach of trust seems to really depend on how you define “spying” in the first place.
In conversations over email with parents across the country, it’s clear that people have dramatically different views about the definition and whether it’s an appropriate behavior to help keep children safe.
“I don’t call it spying. I call it parenting,” said Amanda Rodriguez, a mom of three boys in Frederick, Maryland, which is pretty much how I feel as well.
Rodriguez says her sons know she will have the passwords to all their social media and email accounts until they’re 18 and that she regularly reads the texts of her oldest son, who’s now 13.
“I’m not sitting around listening on the other handset when he’s on the phone or wearing a disguise to the school dance, but … were I to become suspicious about his actions or fearful of his safety, I would totally get out my fake mustache and crash a dance,” said Rodriguez, founder of the blog Dude Mom.
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“If you want privacy, the Internet is not the place to find it,” said Friedman, who has twins in middle school. “Better for kids to find that out from their parents learning something about them the kid didn’t want them to know than for it to be a college admission officer, potential employer or some ill-intentioned stranger getting closer than they’d like.”
Sharon Kennedy, a mom of two girls near Denver, has mixed feelings about the issue and probably sums up how a lot of parents reading this might feel.
Sure, there are probably instances where some form of spying or monitoring is warranted, she says, especially when technology is such a huge part of everyday life, but aren’t there other steps parents can put in place, she asks, such as banning computers and phones from the bedroom during evenings and trying to have family dinners together when possible?
“I truly believe that being present has the most positive effect on our kids,” said Kennedy. “More presence = the need for less spying (hopefully!)”
Do you think it’s OK to spy on your kids? Share your thoughts with Kelly Wallace on Twitter or CNN Living on Facebook.
